Ten Minutes of Talmud #168 — Four for the Price of Three — Rabbi Amy Scheinerman

They [the five disciples of Rabban Yochanan b. Zakkai] each said three things. R. Eliezer said: Let your colleague’s honor be as precious to you as your own; and do not be easily provoked to anger; and repent one day before your death. Warm yourself before the fire of the wise, but beware of being singed by their glowing coals because their bite is the bite of a fox, and their sting is the sting of a scorpion, and their hiss is the hiss of a viper, and all their words are like coals of fire. (Pirkei Avot 2:10)

INTRODUCTION

In Pirkei Avot 2:8 we meet Rabban Yochanan b. Zakkai, the sage who led the Jewish community when the Second Temple was destroyed in 70 C.E. He introduces his five primary disciples — in time, important sages themselves — by recounting their greatest attributes. In Pirkei Avot 2:9, we learn how they responded to their master’s questions, “What is the right way to live?” and “What should one avoid in life?” as well as the responses Rabban Yochanan preferred. Mishnah 2:10 tells us we will learn three important teachings of each of the five disciples, beginning with R. Eliezer, who teaches three principles, and adds a fourth for good measure. 

R. Eliezer b. Hyrcanus lived through the Destruction and on into the second century. Tradition holds that in the midst of the siege of Jerusalem, R. Eliezer and his colleague, R. Yehoshua b. Chananiah, smuggled their master safely out of Jerusalem and joined him in establishing Yavneh as the seat of rabbinic scholarship (BT Gittin 56a). R. Eliezer held conservative views, often agreeing with the perspective of the School of Shammai. This brought him into conflict with his colleagues on a number of occasions and, eventually, into crisis over an issue of ritual purity. Refusing to accept the decision of the majority in the Sanhedrin, R. Eliezer was excommunicated. Gemara records that, wielding magical powers, he responded with fury by wreaking destruction and even bringing about the death of his brother-in-law, Rabban Gamliel, the nasi (president) of the Sanhedrin, who succeeded Rabban Yochanan. R. Eliezer’s often pugilistic and occasionally bitte relationship with his colleagues is reflected in this mishnah.

COMMENTARY

R. Eliezer offers three pieces of wisdom that readily speak to people living in any era. While each alone stands as a sound ethical teaching of proper conduct, it is likely that R. Eliezer had in mind  that the troika should address the challenge of maintaining proper relationships with colleagues. The first teaching is to prize a colleague’s honor as highly as one’s own. Optimally, colleagues are a source of assistance, support, and encouragement. But they can also provide uncomfortable competition, leading to a host of negative outcomes. If our words and actions convey that we esteem them and accord them due respect, we are far more likely to build constructive, working relationships with them. Certainly a win-win. In the Sanhedrin and in the wider world of Torah study, this is a win-win for the entire nation of Israel.

Second, R. Eliezer warns us to control our temper — advice he seems to have found difficult to apply in his own life and perhaps, as a result, appreciated all the more. One who is slow to anger and not easily provoked  is able to consider alternative ways to interpret people’s words and actions, and thereby exhibit understanding and compassion (which are easily extinguished by quick anger). Seething anger leads us to do and say things that are difficult to take back or undo, damage not quickly forgiven, let alone forgotten.

Third, the admonition to repent one day before our death raises the obvious question, “But how do we know when that day will be?” Therefore Gemara (BT Shabbat 153a) notes that one should repent every day. This teaching conveys a perspective on life and relationships that insists we take  responsibility for our errors, not allow wrongs to fester, apologize promptly, and repair relationships with alacrity. The more time passes, the harder errors and misunderstandings are to repair, and everyone suffers as a result.

As a “bonus,” R. Eliezer shares a troubling view of his experience with his rabbinic colleagues, possibly a reflection of his traumatic excommunication. The “warmth” of the fire of Torah wisdom shared in the study house is valuable. But if colleagues fail to adhere to R. Eliezer's three points of wisdom, there is danger of scholars becoming competitors and predators rather than priceless friends and colleagues. Perhaps R. Eliezer’s teachings are most profitably viewed as musar (Jewish ethics) values and priorities to aspire to. After all, every experience in life offers us an opportunity to live what we learn and succeed accordingly.

QUESTIONS TO CONSIDER AND DISCUSS

1. Have you made efforts to protect the honor of a colleague in principle, or in order to preserve a constructive relationship, even when you did not admire (or even respect) this person? What was the result? Have you experienced colleagues failing to protect your honor? How did it feel and how did it affect your working relationship with them?
2. The talmudic Rabbis have much to say about the destructive power of anger in our lives. Can you recall a time when you suppressed your anger to make room to consider the perspective of the person whose words or deeds offended you? Were you able to hold back your anger and see things through their eyes? If so, what was the result?
3. It is often difficult to apologize, but it is also the case that when we offer an apology, the other person is so grateful that they, too, apologize for their part in the exchange, as rabbinic stories about Aaron convey. Has this happened to you?